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Bye Bye Baby

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Monday, August 15, 2011

Bye Bye Baby

Get a load of this guy.

That would be my KINDERGARTNER!

Say Wha????

Yes, I now am the proud parent of a very excited kindergartner.  And I can hardly deal with it.


Today when I dropped him off, I walked him in to make sure he knows where to go and all, and I have to admit that I was honestly a little sad when he bounded into the classroom, put his bookbag in his cubby that he found at orientation the other night, and then said "Bye Mama, I love you.  Have a great day!" before walking off to get started with his own day.

I mean, I'm SOOO glad he's happy to go, but this day has been so bittersweet for me.  Today marks the end of an era for our family.  There will be no more lazy mornings save for weekends and vacations.  I will always be heading out in the mornings to take someone to school.  I won't have all my little chicks home anymore every day.  And the reality is that now, an outside source will tell us when we can vacation, where we have to be every day, how to spend parts of our days (especially once homework begins down the road), and how much facetime my children have with one another.  I find myself I ready for this for the rest of my life?  My first response is "no."  And if it weren't for some unbelievable generosity of my family to help us pay for a private school that we LOVE, I am pretty sure I'd be dipping my toes into the waters of homeschooling.  Not because I think any one kind of schooling is better than another...I don't, but because I know that there are certain hopes and expectations that for our family are best met in the private christian school where Tid Bit goes.  But I still have to wonder if I'm the mom that could hack it homeschooling.  If I'd still enjoy my kids as much if I was the one who taught them day in and out...and I honestly don't know. 

Tid Bit in particular is wildly social and came home today just gushing about his first day.  He's worn a proud grin on his face since he hopped into the car and told me about his job this week to carry the 911 box in case of emergencies.  He beamed when he told me that "in K5 every day is different because we're big enough to change it up alot."  He's getting big...and he's so loving it.  I do too, but I see my little boy slipping through my fingers as he becomes a man.  When I stopped nursing I felt my hand open over his life, and today, I feel that grip loosening again.  I want to hold tight to these days of young children, even the days I am at my wit's end and throw eggs at the wall and completely lose it...I want to cherish this time of being over tired, under appreciated, and sometimes pushed to the brink of what seems sane.  These days are so much shorter than the days of grown children will be.  I've heard it said that the days may crawl, but the years will fly by....and I'm already seeing that ring true.

So today I said goodbye to a baby and hello to a kindergartner ....and that my friends is an idea that is hard to loosen my grip on.

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At August 15, 2011 at 3:34 PM , Blogger Crisp Interiors said...

OH my....I just cried! Seriously...cried! You have the sweetest way of putting things into words! Give little Tid Bit a hug for me. Cannot believe he's a big boy now! Love you!

At August 15, 2011 at 4:17 PM , Blogger ~Sam said...

This was hard for me to read too:( I am a mommy who would love to hear all those fun things they come home from school saying and being proud of themselves. I don't know if you know that I will be homeschooling our boys. I have been a mess all weekend knowing that today would have been Jax's "meet the teacher" and Wednesday would have been his "1st day of school" picture. It was all so normal when I just kept him home instead of pre-school but now that I know his life changes at this point from my childhood, sometimes I still get a little anxious about it all!

But that being said, I know that God has led me down this path for a reason and I couldn't be more excited to have him at home and learning from us. You could be an awesome teacher for your guy too if you had to but I'm happy for you guys that you've got a school that you LOVE. Just let me know if you ever have questions about the "other side:)" because I've met SO many wonderful people down here that have helped me get comfortable!

At August 16, 2011 at 9:00 AM , Blogger Carole said...

Yes, the years certainly do fly by. My oldest graduated high school this past June. It's definitely bittersweet.

Thanks for the Follow on Twitter. :) Glad to have met you.

At August 18, 2011 at 9:14 AM , Blogger Ashlee said...

I hope he had a great day! I'm dreading it myself!


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