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To Pose or Not To Pose....Maternity Photos

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Wednesday, April 13, 2011

To Pose or Not To Pose....Maternity Photos

I was talking with some girlfriends this morning about maternity photographs.  I personally am not a fan, but have seen some that are tastefully done.  My take on it is that my pregnant belly isn't nearly as darling as what's going to come out of it, so no need to preserve forever the memory of my popped out belly button encircled by my hands making a heart shape....just not gonna go there personally people.  If that's your bag....good for you.  I bet you are a really cute pregnant person....or you could be delusional....I will not venture to say which if I don't know you.

Anyhow, one of my friends reminded me this morning of the MOST hilarious email that I got back at the end of last year.  It's from a blog post from The Pregnant Chicken and it's just absolutely hysterical.  I had to search back through my emails to find it, but find it I did....and now I'm gonna share it with you.  Thanks to The Pregnant Chicken, I give you the following.... (My comments are in black...everything in green is from The Pregnant Chicken....want to make sure to give credit where credit is due!)

In case you may want to capture your pregnancies in a photograph to preserve the wonder of life here are a few gems from awkwardfamilyphotos.com which may provide a little inspiration.
  

"Karen, seeing as you're pregnant, let's put you at the top of the family photo where the air is thinner. Karen? Karen?!?!"

I think the thing that is MOST disturbing to me is that this was a CHRISTMAS CARD....I can appreciate what they were trying to do here but if your Christmas photo looks like it should have a "becka, becka, bow wow" soundtrack playing in the background, then you may want to reconsider the card.

I can't decide whether I like the garbage bag dress, the swamp or his black socks in the water better.

"That's it, Steve. A little further back, a little further. Now crouch down. Perfect!" I think the ex-boyfriend may have been the photographer in this one.

This reminds me of a picnic. A good idea in theory but an uncomfortable mess in practice.

Words can't describe this photo. Oh wait a minute, they can!

Okay, I actually love this photo but the toe shoes are the real kicker. Ha kicker!

"It's going to be a good year, Laura. A very Goodyear indeed."

At first I thought "Nothing symbolizes maternity better than a watermelon and a gun" and then I thought "Actually, nothing *does* symbolize maternity better than a watermelon and a gun". Bravo Mad'am.
Like the previous Christmas card, if it looks skeezy when nobody is pregnant, then a baby bump ain't saving it so don't do it. A helpful holiday tip we can all tuck in our pockets.

"If I'm holding the baby then why do I still feel fat?"

Um, yeah. No. I'm just going to go with a solid no on this one.

Why do I feel like this woman was talked into this? I could see her thinking, "I'm just too tired to argue plus the kids won't be able to take off because hockey equipment will slow them down and I'll hold their heads. I'm sure it will look fine."

  

PS. I removed a mortifyingly nude maternity picture after I originally posted thisRelated Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger... upon a realization that the entire post could be blocked from some computers with child lock controls in place.  If that was your favorite picture and you thought it was the most hilarious thing ever...Pregnant Chicken still has it on her site!

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posted by Logan @LifeforDessert @ 2:25 PM   7 Comments

7 Comments:

At April 13, 2011 at 11:14 PM , Blogger ~Sam said...

That was the best laugh I've had all week!

 
At April 14, 2011 at 11:47 AM , Blogger Janell @ House of Fifty said...

Okay, that was hilarious...lol until your crying funny! What were these people (and the photographer?!) thinking?
Janell

 
At April 14, 2011 at 1:05 PM , Blogger Logan @LifeforDessert said...

Janell...I have wondered the same thing myself?! And to make some of those into Christmas cards?! Can you imagine opening that up? What a way to celebrate the holidays?! So far beyond me, all I can do is roll around laughing!

 
At April 14, 2011 at 3:38 PM , Blogger L.Duncan@Home23DuncanBoys said...

Just saw Janell's tweet! OMG, these are crazy! Your commentary made them even more funny!

 
At April 14, 2011 at 6:18 PM , Blogger Kimberly said...

If I EVER got that as a Christmas card I'd die. Thanks for this post, I definitely needed a good laugh!!

 
At April 26, 2011 at 4:36 AM , Anonymous Deana Pearse said...

@Kimberly: LOL! Me, too.
These photos are so funny and your comments made them funnier, although the mothers-to-be were symbolizing how beautiful it is to bear a child and let it grow inside them. The wonders of motherhood are amazingly inspiring.

 
At May 4, 2011 at 10:34 PM , Anonymous Stephanie said...

You gotta wonder what some people are thinking sometimes!! Good for a laugh though!!

 

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